Look for the miracles

Anyone who has known me for a while will realise I don’t believe in God, but do believe the universe looks after us if we are clear in our intentions. It’d be fair to say there’s some big stuff happening in our wider family at the moment, and some huge challenges.

Last weekend I said to my sister “at least we haven’t seen four horsemen” and she (sort of) laughed and said she could hear hoofbeats! The next day, we were presented with more challenges.

Yet this week there’s been some amazing stuff too. Some medical issues are improving or are being well looked after. My niece Rosie and her partner Jason got engaged, and their baby bump started to show. So much love ❤

Even when things are dark and life seems bloody difficult, it’s worth being crystal clear in your intentions and watching for the miracles.

P!nk on my mind

On the way to and from work I listen to music on the car stereo, from my iPhone – isn’t technology wonderful! A lot of the time I listen to P!nk, closely followed by HIM, Def Leppard and Guns ‘n Roses. Sometimes I choose the song because of the beat, or the message in the lyrics, or a bit of both. Looking back at previous pages reminds me of music I love, and of where my head was at when I did the layout.

Dylusions – Small journal. Paint: Rose quartz, Vanilla custard, Slate grey. Stencils: Diamonds in the rough, Love hearts, fronds of foliage. Stamps: Dy’s alphabet.
Other: Archival ink, Distress collage medium, Distress oxide ink, white gel pen, Pitt big brush pen.

Rabbit head!

I’ve been playing in my large Dylusions journal and decided to replace the model’s head with a rabbit’s head. Is it a perfect fit? Nope. And that’s ok…

Dylusions: large journal. Sprays – Slate grey, White linen, Polished jade, Calypso teal & After midnight. Stamps – Heads n tails, Dy’s alphabet. Stencils – Sugar lumps, Circles.

Other: Archival ink, White gel pen, Pitt big brush pen, Tombow markers, Distress collage medium, Distress ink.

World Obesity Day

Today is World Obesity Day. I have been obese – my BMI was 48. Normal weight range for my height is 62-70kg approx. On many charts I am still slightly overweight, and that’s ok.

Weight loss surgery saved my life, but it is not a cure. I am an addict and always will be. Some people would argue I am a “recovering addict” but I am not so sure. The struggle is real, daily, and hard. Bloody hard.

I have tools I can use, including my tiny stomach, and a host of psychological tips and tricks. The harsh reality, though, is my head craves the dopamine hit food gives me. Food is my best friend & comfort, and my solution to everything – shame, anger, boredom, tiredness and so on. Some days I won, some days I lose – some days I chose the dopamine hit.

A drug addict can survive the rest of their life without another fix, an alcoholic can avoid ever tasting alcohol again. I have to face my drug of choice – food – multiple times a day in order to survive.

Next time you see someone who is obese, please don’t judge them. They might be mortally ashamed (yes, fat shame kills us because we avoid the medical system). They might have already lost 1, 10 or 100kgs. They might be booked in for weight loss surgery or trying to fund it. They might have had surgery, regained the weight and are wondering if suicide is the only way out.

Obesity is not just about the food we put in our mouths. It’s about our society, childhood deprivation (especially of maternal love), environmental factors, poverty, and much more. Please don’t judge. Please do support.

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